HYDERABAD: Listening to the tragic stories of victims of sexual exploitation from the comfort of our bedrooms could at best have been a “humbling experience” for many. But for some people in the city, who had such traumatic experiences themselves, last Sunday’s Satyamev Jayate was nothing short of a catharsis.
22-year-old Neha (name changed), believes the show was the best thing that could have happened to Indian television. She has been sexually abused at least five times since the age of 12. And, as horrifying as it may sound, the first time, at the hands of her own brother. “I was 12 and my brother was 14. We used to sleep in the same room. Once, when I was asleep, my brother tried to feel me for a while. Even though I woke up, I was scared to say or do anything,” recalls Neha.
Later, she had a nightmare while travelling in a train.
“I was sleeping on the middle berth. There was a man on the top berth, and he misbehaved with me. Even though I tried to yell, nobody could hear me and I was left helpless,” she shares. The sad part is she didn’t know at the time how to describe what had happened to her. “I knew what those men were doing to me was not right, but did not know what to call it,” she says. And, this has had serious affects on her personality.
“I used to be a very naughty kid before the first incident took place. However, after that, I became an introvert and would usually be in my own world,” she explains, going down the memory lane. She took a PG diploma course in psychology in a college last year to come to terms with her past.
“I have discussed this with my friends, but have not told my parents about it yet. I am afraid they will feel guilty that they were not able to protect me. But, now I have become a lot more confident as a person and it is all because of my psychology programme,” she says with a smile.
In her opinion, 'Satyamev Jayate' has provided a platform for victims like her to speak candidly about their experiences. “Sexual abuse of children is very common, but never spoken about. But, because of this show, it has become a topic of discussion and I am very happy about it,” she confesses.
Like her, Ashwini Kar (name changed), who is currently working with an MNC in the city, shares her experience. “When I was 10, my father was transferred and all of us migrated to Lucknow. Since both my parents were working and had a hectic schedule, I was admitted in a residential school. I was shy as a child. And this worked to the advantage of the hostel warden. He used to force me to perform fellatio on him. This happened several times and finally, I had to flee from the school. I informed my parents about it. They understood and never sent me to that school. This happened several years ago, but I suffer from that trauma till this date.”
And, she says that after watching the show, she is happy that the issue is being addressed on national television by a renowned celebrity.
There are others too who are indirectly victims of our society’s preference for a boy. After the death of her mother, 23-year-old Kritika (name changed), is now taking care of her five sisters, the youngest of them being a six-year-old.
This is because her parents were pressurised not to opt for family planning until they had a boy and the couple ended up having six daughters. “My mother passed away a few months ago. Apart from the fact that I miss her so much, I also have to play the role of a home-maker while I pursue my studies,” shares Kritika, adding, “my youngest sister treats me like a mother and at times, it becomes difficult to handle everything. Due to this frustration, there are times when I end up hitting my sisters. My father also seems helpless. I reckon the magnitude of the problem would have been a lot lesser if my parents had not have given in to the pressure of my grandparents. I don’t understand this need for a boy in the family!”
Sonam Singh, who hails from Haryana, works for a Hyderabad-based NGO and she too, though lucky, is pained at her friends’ plight back home. “In my town, girls are not sent to school or allowed to watch television for fear that they will get spoilt. Even if some primary education is allowed, the society is of the impression that a girl should know how to be a home-maker, rather than learn some addition and subtraction of numbers. I feel extremely lucky for having been born to parents who did not care about such a society and let me study and work as well. I have many friends from my primary school who are currently married and are burdened with taking care of the house, husband and children,” she says. About the show, she hopes it has some impact in interior villages and towns of Haryana where female foeticide is rampant.