Health-related queries will be answered by Dr Kannan Gireesh weekly:
I am a third-year BTech student. I love a girl very much but she avoids me. I am unable to control my feelings and can’t focus on my studies. I am stressed. Please advise.
It is very clear that she is least interested in you. This is when we start feeling a more intense desire to be with that person. You need to realise you are in the college to study. This should be your top priority. Anything else is just a passing phase. Time is your greatest asset. Your career will go for a toss if you waste your time on such intentions unnecessarily. Take a strong resolution to focus on your studies with an intense zeal to achieve and surely you will be able to succeed. Rememeber you can never make a cat bark. So move on.
I am a third-year engineering student and was in a relationship with my college senior for two years. We were very intimate both emotionally and physically and he was very caring and affectionate. But he has been avoiding me for three months. He is very interested in another girl. I am shattered and don’t know what to do. Please help.
You need to realise that he was just using you. One of the biggest mistake that you can do at this age is to get physically intimate. Since you decided to have sex he has become bored. So he wants to move on to a different person. Real life is not a movie where you have a fairy tale ending. When the relationship is not a committed one then getting physically involved is a real gamble. What you need to understand is that you have been saved from being with a person who could have ruined your life. You have to see the positive side of the problem and move on.
My son is studying in the class VIII. He is not very interested in studies. His grades are very poor. He is always distracted. What do you think has to be done?
First thing you need to do is to find out what is stopping him from studying. Is he very distracted, irritable or depressed or is he having difficulty in concentration, reading and memorising. Based on that you have to proceed. First you need to rule out an attention deficit disorder and a learning disorder. For this, you need to consult a trained professional and undergo a psychometric test. Once that is done, you would get a clear idea as to the next step
Dr Kannan Gireesh is a consultant psychiatrist, psychotherapist and counsellor. He lives in Chennai. Students can SMS their queries to (0) 98414 16422 or send an email to queries.edex@newindianexpress.com